God came and asked me for a wish, I told GOD "Let all my friends are healthy and happy forever!"
God said: But for 4 days only!
I said: Yes, let them be a Spring Day, Summer Day, Autumn Day, and Winter Day.
GOD said: 3 days...
I said: Yes, Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow.
GOD said: No, 2 days!
I said: Yes, a Bright Day (Daytime) and Dark Day (Nighttime).
GOD said: No, just 1 day!
I said: Yes!
GOD asked: Which day?
I said: Every Day in the living years of all my friends!
GOD laughed, and said: You INDIANS know how to negotiate, but since you are praying and asking happiness for your friends, I cannot refuse.
I love everyone who thinks of others first, so don't you worry.
Monday, March 22, 2010
An Indian in a U.S. school...
It was the first day of a school in US and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade.
The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History.
Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death"?
She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up:
"Patrick Henry, 1775" he said.
"Very good!"
Who said "Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?"
Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrasekhar.
The te acher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed.
Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do."
She heard a loud whisper: "F**k the Indians,"
"Who said that?" she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up.
"General Custer, 1862."
At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."
The teacher glares around and asks "All right! Now, who said that?"
Again, Chandrasekhar says, "Al Gore to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."
Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? Suck this!"
Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"
Now with almost mob hysteria someone said "You little shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you."
Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004."
The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, "Oh sh*t, we're f**ked!"
And Chandrasekhar said quietly,
I think it was George Bush, Iraq, 2007."
The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History.
Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death"?
She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up:
"Patrick Henry, 1775" he said.
"Very good!"
Who said "Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?"
Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrasekhar.
The te acher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed.
Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do."
She heard a loud whisper: "F**k the Indians,"
"Who said that?" she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up.
"General Custer, 1862."
At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."
The teacher glares around and asks "All right! Now, who said that?"
Again, Chandrasekhar says, "Al Gore to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."
Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? Suck this!"
Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"
Now with almost mob hysteria someone said "You little shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you."
Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004."
The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, "Oh sh*t, we're f**ked!"
And Chandrasekhar said quietly,
I think it was George Bush, Iraq, 2007."
English language
It's murder of English language. But Too Funny.
Just Read It.
The Leave Applications; )
Infosys , Bangalore : An employee applied for leave as follows:
"Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife , please sanction me one-week leave."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is from Oracle Bangalore: >From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son:
"as I want to shave my son's head , please leave me for two days.."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter , please grant a week's leave.."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From H.A.L. Administration Dept:
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it , please grant me 10 days leave."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:
"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return , please grant me half day casual leave"
An incident of a leave letter:
"I am suffering from fever , please declare one-day holiday."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A leave letter to the headmaster:
"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
"As my headache is paining , please grant me leave for the day."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Covering note:
"I am enclosed herewith..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another one:
"Dear Sir: with reference to the above , please refer to my below..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Actual letter written for application of leave:
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Letter writing:-
"I am well here and hope you are also in the same well."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A candidate's job application:
"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience , I am applying for the post.
Just Read It.
The Leave Applications; )
Infosys , Bangalore : An employee applied for leave as follows:
"Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife , please sanction me one-week leave."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is from Oracle Bangalore: >From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son:
"as I want to shave my son's head , please leave me for two days.."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter , please grant a week's leave.."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From H.A.L. Administration Dept:
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it , please grant me 10 days leave."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:
"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return , please grant me half day casual leave"
An incident of a leave letter:
"I am suffering from fever , please declare one-day holiday."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A leave letter to the headmaster:
"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
"As my headache is paining , please grant me leave for the day."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Covering note:
"I am enclosed herewith..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another one:
"Dear Sir: with reference to the above , please refer to my below..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Actual letter written for application of leave:
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Letter writing:-
"I am well here and hope you are also in the same well."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A candidate's job application:
"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience , I am applying for the post.
Salary Increase
HOW TO ASK YOUR BOSS
FOR A SALARY INCREASE..?
One day an employee sends a letter to his boss asking for an increase in his salary !!!
Dear Bo$$
In thi$ life, we all need $omething mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding the need$ of u$. We are worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat a nd $ervice to your company ..
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I meant and re$pond $oon.
Your$ $incerely,
The next day, the employee received this letter of reply:
Dear
I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOw a days, NOthing much has changed. You must have NOticed that our company is NOt doing NOticably well . NOw the newspapers are saying the world's leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United States may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad. I have NOthing more to add NOw. You kNOw what I mean .
---- Your Boss
Pre- KG Last Bench Guys--
|
|
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
After Semester Exams..!! - Remember the golden days
1st Bench:
Hey the paper was tough... But I will get 95 da.. :)
2nd Bench:
Machi... 10 Marks out da.. :(
3rd Bench:
Mama.. Clear aayrum... :)
4th Bench:
Clear aanalum aagum :(
5th Bench:
Sure shot.. Sathyama out.. :)
Last Bench Rockers:
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
Machaan.. Invigilator sema figure daa... :) :) :)
Hey the paper was tough... But I will get 95 da.. :)
2nd Bench:
Machi... 10 Marks out da.. :(
3rd Bench:
Mama.. Clear aayrum... :)
4th Bench:
Clear aanalum aagum :(
5th Bench:
Sure shot.. Sathyama out.. :)
Last Bench Rockers:
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
!
Machaan.. Invigilator sema figure daa... :) :) :)
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
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